GROWING UP/ The film that reminds us what's inside real relationships
Greta Scarano's film "La vita da grandi" tells the story of Irene and her relationship with her autistic brother Omar.
Growing Up is a moving film inspired by a story of autism, that of Damiano and Margherita Tercon, told in the book "My Sister Breaks My Balls. A Story of Normal Autism." Director Greta Scarano, in her debut feature, wanted to tell this story by showing, in several passages, the human richness that can come from a relationship with an autistic person and how today we are all called upon to change our approach to encounter others, breaking free from the attitude that cages them in patterns that are justified because they are considered educational, but which in fact suffocate life, not only for those with autism, but also for those who think they are helping them, but actually do the opposite.
The film tells the story of Irene, played with great emotional involvement by Matilda De Angelis, and her brother Omar, whom Yuri Tuci brings to life and shows all the unique features of his autism.
The story is very simple: Irene, since her mother and father have to take a trip for medical reasons, must return from Rome to Rimini to take care of her brother, who has very ambitious dreams: he wants to perform on stage in a program aimed at discovering new talent in the entertainment industry.
The relationship between the two is very difficult at first, Irene can't stand her brother's oddities and is conditioned by her parents' position who, thinking they were protecting him, have actually prevented him from following the path he most liked by attempting to perform on a stage.
After several attempts to block Omar's every move, Irene begins to realize she's dealing with a man who is aware of himself, of who he is, and of the drama he's going through. She changes her perspective, starting to see him as someone who wants to grow up, and comes up with the idea of an intensive course so that he can finally make choices in the face of life's circumstances and not be dominated by the choices of others, as he was accustomed to in his relationship with his parents.
In this shift in perspective that Irene conquers and through which she leads Omar to make choices, something unthinkable happens: Irene herself changes, questioning her well-planned life. The film's passages in which Irene finds freedom from her life plans and places the desire for happiness at the center of everything are moving. Just as Omar was learning from Irene to live by making choices, so Irene conquers for herself the freedom and desire for happiness that her brother communicates to her.
Thus, this film communicates the reciprocal nature of true relationships and demonstrates what the relationship between so-called normal people and autistic people should be like, but what every relationship should be like, because within every relationship, what matters is freedom and the growing desire for happiness, because, as Irene herself tells her partner, what matters in life, even more than a mortgage, is happiness.
Grown Ups is thus an excellent film that demonstrates how, in every relationship, we shouldn't worry about teaching the other how to live, but rather it's important and crucial to discover the richness that the other person represents for our own existence. In this film, it's clear and fascinating that by listening to others, we understand ourselves better.
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